How can couples avoid the 7 year itch?

Couples continue to face many challenges which could include the 7 year itch. Marriage involves a man and woman loving each other and embracing a lifelong commitment for their entire lives. Couples can eliminate the effect of the 7 year itch by developing marital processes that ensure they remain focused on their love for God and each other. 

According to the article, How to combat the proven 7-year-itch Relationship Roadblock, it is believed that the 7 year itch is causing many marriages to have challenges. “Widely studied by psychologists and love experts, the notion that marriages hit a rough spot around year seven has been supported and disputed. Some say the time when a marriage is more likely to fail is more like three or four years in. Others, such as a recent OnePoll study commissioned by Pure Romance and shared with Verily, in which a thousand Americans who had be married an average of twenty years and at lest five years old, found that year seven was the worst.” 

The article emphasizes that couples protect their marriage from the 7 year itch by:

1.  Enhancing Communication

2.  Minimizing the impact of fighting 

3.  Learn to talk about the hard subjects

4.  Seek counseling

The suggestions offered to avoid the seven year itch do not respond to the root causes that will contribute to the 7-year itch.

Enhancing communication to avoid the 7-year-itch requires several strategies. The first mistake is that before couples stop communicating, they stop touching each other. As a matter of fact, when couples become angry with each other the first thing that happens is that they stop touching. The husband and wife must make a concerted effort to ensue that when and if they become angry with each other that they will continue to touch each other physically. One way to accomplish this task is to utilized The Luveuphoria Formula and husbands can use the 10 Luveuphoria Challenge.

Ephesians 4:26 – 27 instructs individuals not to allow the sun go down on their anger. This is a primary mistake for many people which includes couples who desire to avoid the 7 year itch.

Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil (Ephesians 4:26,27).

One way to avoid this challenge is to utilize a conflict reflection tool. Couples can use the conflict reflection tool as follows:

  1. After the couple has had their disagreement, they need to retreat to a quiet space.
  2. Take a blank piece of paper and draw a line down the middle of the paper.
  3. On the right side, write down what was said by each person during the disagreement.
  4. Then on the left side, write down what you were thinking when each statement was made.
  5. Next, you want to circle the turning point of the argument. This is the point where you had an opportunity to ensure that the conversation remained positive. This is called the inflection point.
  6. Once you have determined the inflection point of the argument develop a strategy to ensure that the next disagreement regarding this challenge does not become an argument.

Another process that couples can use to avoid the 7 year itch instead of just talking about hard subjects is to develop a shared vision and a strategic plan for their family. A shared vision is a mental vision of the marriage that the couple will agree on. It will provide the energy and focus needed for the husband and wife to begin the learning process for the development of their strategic plan.

Developing a strategic will provide couples an opportunity to discuss their goals and have discussions with the travesties associated with a dysfunctional organization such as a marriage that is enraged by the 7 year itch.

Related Articles

Has your marriage hit the seven-year itch? Here’s how to survive it

Bored of your beloved? Blame it on the seven-year itch phenomenon

Seven-year itch really DOES make a divorce more likely: Professor says the statistics back up the superstition 

 

In Christ,

 

Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell
PO Box 4707
Cherry Hill, NJ 08012

(856) 566-3267
www.advancedmarriagetraining.com

 

Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land

-Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives)

– Advanced Marriage Training for Singles

– Husband Leadership Principles

 All Three     Advanced     Husband Leadership Book     luveuphoria-app-for-facebook-png

 

“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.

 

Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell

Samaritan Baptist Church

Trenton, NJ

“I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.

 

Dr. James E. Woods, II

El Shaddia Christian Assembly

Philadelphia, PA

 Derrick and Sheila

 

How can couples bulletproof their marriage?

In a recent article, several authors believe that the best way to bulletproof a marriage is to treat it like a business. Marriage is a sacred institution. Marriage should not be treated like a business. This also implies that a successful marriage is dependent on the economical system of the country. Couples can only bulletproof their marriage by replicating the characteristics associated with the original design of marriage (Ordermige).

According to the article, Couples learn how to bulletproof their marriage and invest in a life-long relationship, counselors Renato and Cardoso have created a guide for helping singles and couples. “The co-authors state that marriage is like a business and that problems should be approached as they would in a company, seeking a win-win situation for everyone. If one loses, both lose. So remember the company’s goals, the team, not just the individual. Similar to a company, propose a solution that addresses the cause of the problem. Having identified the challenge, couples are guided on how to agree a plan of action, define who will do what and test it to see if it offers a practical solution.” Treating a marriage like a business is problematic because it does not guide couples to replicate the original design of marriage.

The original design of marriage has three primary components. The fist component that is found in Genesis 2:16 which provides an insight on what preparation and characteristics will qualify a man to be a husband. The perspective husband must be a servant and a good steward over the resources that God has provided.

A servant is a person who obedient and faithful to God – The Father of Jesus Christ.(Joshua 1:2; 2 Kings 8:19; Daniel 6:20; Colossians 4:12; 2 Timothy 2:24). Our great almighty God Jesus Christ was a servant too. “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45). Jesus Christ servanthood attitude was exemplified according to Philippians 2:6-7.

“Who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, taking the form of a servant” (Philippians 2:6-7).

A servant will also have a relationship with Jesus Christ. He will dedicate himself to his calling. He will be a great steward over the resources that God has provided. Daniel provides an example of a good steward. Like many of us, Daniel was a steward in a foreign land. Whatever God entrust us with, whether it is gifts of ability, intellect, possessions, position, or financial prosperity, he places those gifting into our lives to bless others, and to further God’s purposes. Daniel and his friends Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah, who are better, know as Shadrach, Meschach and Abendego, found themselves as captives who were temporarily living in Babylon. As stewards, they choose to live a modest life style (Daniel 1:3-30).

  • Daniel used his gifts to glorify God (Daniel 2: 1-47).
  • Daniel risked his life to save pagan magicians form the king’s wrath (Daniel 2:24).
  • Daniel used his position and power to bless others (Daniel 2:48-49).
  • Daniel and his friends responded to the king with respect after proving that God was greater than the king’s god (Daniel 3:1-30).
  • Daniel recognized that his gifts were to not for self-indulgence but to bring about God’s purposes (Daniel 5:13-23).

The second component for the original design of marriage which will help couples to bulletproof their marriage is found in Genesis 2:16-17. God gave Adam instruction on what he could and could not do. One area that many men and woman have challenges with is pre-marital sex. Even though there is no specific prohibition in the Bible against sex between an unmarried man and unmarried woman. However, “sexual immorality” is denounced in about 25 passages in the New Testament. The word translated as “sexual immorality” or “fornication” in English versions of the Bible is the Greek word porneia, which means “illicit sexual intercourse.”

The third component that will help couples to bulletproof their marriage is found in Genesis 2:18. This is the area that the authors are directing couples to concentrate on without considering the original design of marriage. In this phase couples are to work together as a team. They are to have a primary focus on where God has called the man to serve. It does not minimize the Spiritual Gifts endowed to the wife, but it highlights the couples calling on their lives which is the only way for couples to bulletproof their marriage.

Related Articles

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In Christ,

Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell PO Box 4707

Cherry Hill, NJ 08003

(856) 566-3267

www.advancedmarriagetraining.com

 

Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land -Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives) – Advanced Marriage Training for Singles

All Three          Advanced

 

“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.

 

Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell

Samaritan Baptist Church

Trenton, NJ “I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.

 

Dr. James E. Woods, II

El Shaddia Christian Assembly

Philadelphia, PA

Derrick and Sheila

Will Julia Roberts marriage advice prevent divorce?

In a recent article, Julia Roberts provides marriage advice that will allegedly avoid the pitfalls associated with divorce. A successful marriage is not isolated to one act. A successful marriage is a collection of behaviors, feelings, and acts that both the man and woman contribute. The marriage advice provided by Julia advice lacks the substance needed to continue in a happy marriage.

According to the article, Julia Roberts Gives Advice for a Successful Marriage, Julie believes that the most important aspect of a is physical contact. She specifically believes that kissing on a daily basis.

This thirteen year marriage veteran is married to Danny Moder and has three children. As a movie star it appears that her viewpoint on marriage is unrealistic. She and her husband have many of the resources that other couples are unable to obtain. At the financial level of their marriage it is interesting to know how kissing can impact a marriage.

How does the marriage advice of kissing impact a marriage?

The proximity associated with a kiss is paramount. Society has placed values on the proximity of the kiss. A kiss on the cheek is an indication of friendship. On the forehead reveals comfort, on the nose is for play, on the lips is love, and on the neck screams a desire for more.

There are several classifications of kisses which include compassion, pecks of play, and smooches displaying affection.  There is a deep passionate kiss that is part of sexual foreplay. God-created the lips as the most sensitive region of the body over the genitals and fingertips. It’s the thinnest skin covering and consist of extensive nerve-endings. Kissing feels so good because lips are designed to feel good.

A kiss is so powerful because it can set off at least four chemical explosions inside the person. First, pheromones, which are airborne chemicals referred to as ‘chemistry’ between people. Natural human scents are emitted unconsciously by all people and when smelt by someone in a close exchange such as a kiss can elicit strong reactions of attraction or aversion.

Secondly, the rush of adrenaline that is produced in a kiss can literally “make your heart race” because with adrenaline, there is an increase in heart rate, blood pressure and dilation of pupils. You feel the surge and it feels good when people kiss.

Thirdly, pleasure centers of the brain become active with the surprise and excitement from a good kiss. The kiss can trigger a release of dopamine which is another hormone that brings a sense of giddiness or euphoria associated with romantic love.

Finally, when the affection is right and the commitment real, a  kiss will release oxytocin that evokes feelings of contentment, reductions in anxiety, and feelings of calmness and security around a mate. Therefore creating a deep bond between the husband and wife.

As powerful as a kiss can be, it is only a minor part of a successful marriage. A successful marriage includes three components which are outlined in the original design of marriage. The marriage advice from Julia Roberts is shallow in that it does not provide the process for infusing agape love.

How can couples infuse agape love which was excluded by Julia Roberts?

Agape love means to love from a social or moral sense. From a social perspective, Agape Love means to form a cooperative and interdependent relationship with others. From a moral perspective, Agape Love means to conform to standards of right and just behavior. When applied to a marriage, Agape Love means to form cooperative, interdependent, and right behavior with your spouse.

Couples will need to work as a team to infuse the concept of agape love for which Julia Roberts has not provided.

Related Articles

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What’s Julia Roberts’ Secret to a Healthy Relationship?

Julia Roberts believes “kissing” is the secret behind her successful marriage with Danny Moder.

In Christ,

 

Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell

PO Box 1668 Blackwood, NJ 08012

(856) 566-3267 www.advancedmarriagetraining.com

 

Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land -Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives) – Advanced Marriage Training for Singles

All Three         Advanced

 

“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.

 

Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell

Samaritan Baptist Church

Trenton, NJ “I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.

 

Dr. James E. Woods, II

El Shaddia Christian Assembly

Philadelphia, PA

Derrick and Sheila

How should husbands handle a smart wife?

In a recent article, a study revealed that men are less likely to formulate a relationship with a perspective smart wife. This study could have ramifications for the future of husbands. Husbands who have a smart wife can make their marriage more productive by adhering to the original design for marriage (Ordermige).

According to the article, Why men are threatened by smart women, men become threatened by woman as a result of violating male tendencies associated with male masculinity. The study involved 105 male participants. The participants read a hypothetical scenario regarding a woman who either outperformed or underperformed them. The men gave favorable responses to women who were regarded as a smart woman when compared to the man.

However, when the man was positioned to meet the smart woman, the tables turned. The men revealed a desire to distance them from meeting the smart woman, rated the same woman as less attractive, and indicated a desire not to exchange information with the woman or go on a date with the woman. The men exhibited characteristics associated with a dysfunctional organization. For husbands to have success with a smart wife they must understand the roles of the husband and wife in a marriage.

What are the husband and smart wife roles in a marriage?

The role of the husband and wife differ according to the source. According to one source, the wife’s duties are limited to submission to her husband and household duties. Specifically, the wife is the manager of the home with the husband as the overseer of her duties and her life. The wife is responsible for the daily care of children, meal preparation, and keeping the house clean and in manageable order. The wife can take on additional responsibilities such as getting a job.

According to the same source, the primary role of the husband is to provide oversight to his wife and children. He provides oversight in the areas of Bible studies and prayers. The second primary role in the family is to be the breadwinner who provides the financial support for the family. Herein lays the problem with a husband who has a smart wife.

Most smart wives make a sizable salary when compared to their husband and other wives. While the bible points out that the husband is the leader of the family, the husband could feel that his leadership is diminished and challenged due to the role that finances can play in a marriage.

What role do finances play in a marriage that consists of a smart wife?

In America, finances can play a major role in a marriage. According to the 2010 American Community Survey, for 24% of couples the wife earns more money than the husband. While the marriage rate decreases for women who earn more money than men, it is also reported that women who earn more money than their husband are less happy in the marriage. According to a survey of 4,000 married couples, researchers found that the percentage of people who reported being “very happy” declined when the wife earns more money than the husband. While close to 50 percent of wives and husbands reported being very happily married, both spouses are 6 percentage points less likely to report a “very happy” marriage when the wife earns more. They’re 8 percentage points more likely to report marital troubles in the past year and 6 percentage points more likely to have discussed separating in the past year. It also appears to affect divorce rates, as they write that having a wife who earns more than her husband “increases the likelihood of divorce by 50 percent.”

Even though the breadwinner wife is the unhappiest, this can also result in unhappiness for both the husband and the marriage. The husband will need to use alternative strategies to ensure a happy marriage.

What strategy should the husband use to ensure a great marriage with a smart wife?

Husbands need only to replicate the original design for marriage (Ordermige) to ensure happiness for both the wife and husband. The husband needs to ensure that he is a servant and good steward over the resources that God provides (Genesis 2:15). If the husband is a servant then he is following his original purpose as ordained by God. If he is a good steward over the resources, then his smart wife is more likely to trust him with the finances.

The next step is for him to follow God’s instructions. Another way for the husband to ensure financial stability is to follow God’s instructions in the area of tithing. According to Malachi 3:10-11, “Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it. And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes, and he shall not destroy the fruits of your ground; neither shall your vine cast her fruit before the time in the field, saith the Lord of hosts.”

The final step is for the husband to ensure that the wife becomes a team player in the area that God has called him to serve. This will add security for the smart wife who is the breadwinner.

Related Articles

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In Christ,

Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell

PO Box 1668 Blackwood, NJ 08012

(856) 566-3267 www.advancedmarriagetraining.com

Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land -Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives) – Advanced Marriage Training for Singles

All Three          Advanced

 

“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.

 

Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell

Samaritan Baptist Church

Trenton, NJ “I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.

 

Dr. James E. Woods, II

El Shaddia Christian Assembly

Philadelphia, PA

Derrick and Sheila

How can couples stay in love forever?

According to a recent article, couples can stay in love if they utilize several small daily practices. Staying in love requires basic principles that supersede daily practices. Couples can only stay in love if they understand what it takes to have a marriage commitment.

According to the article, Marriage Advice: 6 Ways to Stay in Love Forever, the following six main practices will maintain a loving marriage.

  1. Couple Time
  2. Connecting throughout the day
  3. Giving Appreciations
  4. Trying new things
  5. Making each other laugh
  6. Praising your spouse’s physical appearance

While each practice has benefits, it will not become beneficial unless the husband and wife understand commitment.

What type of commitment will ensure that couples stay in love?

According to the world’s standards, commitment is the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity, etc. The classic example of commitment is related to the egg and bacon breakfast. The chicken is involved but the pig is committed. The chicken is involved because they continue to lay the eggs. It is a natural process and their contribution does not have to be permanent. However, the pig is committed because their involvement is permanent.

Commitment involves demonstrating that an individual will engage in something in which it has the highest priority. The Bible also teaches that the highest priority in our lives is our commitment to God. Jesus said, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment” (Matthew 22:37-38).

Furthermore, according to the original design of marriage (Ordermige), both men and women should learn certain commitments before entertaining marriage. The major commitment that the perspective husbands must have is to become a servant and a steward. The perspective wife must learn to be committed to the husband.

What type of servant should the man be to ensure that he and his wife stay in love forever?

According to the original design of marriage (Ordermige), the husband should be a servant that is committed to God. A husband that is committed to God will serve his purpose. God calls every man to serve a purpose that glorifies His name. Noah served his purpose when he obeyed God and built the ark. Joseph served his purpose when he delivered his family from the famine that was in the land of Egypt. Moses served his purpose when he delivered the Israelis from the clutches of the Egyptians. A husband who desires to stay in love forever must maintain a commitment to God by serving in his God ordained purpose.

What type of steward should the man be to ensure that he and his wife stay in love forever?

According to the original design of marriage (Ordermige), God granted Adam a stewardship when He assigned him the duty of protecting the Garden of Eden. A stewardship requires a relationship between the master and the one that the master entrusts with the resources.

Stewards faithfully use their talents and resources to glorify God. In the parable regarding the talents, Jesus teaches us that we are to use our resources to glorify God (Matthew 25: 14-30). It does not matter whether the resources are epic or miniscule. God expects men to be good stewards over the resources that He provides.

What type of wife should a woman be to ensure that she and her husband stay in love forever?

According to the original design of marriage (Ordermige), God made Eve to be a helper. God added Eve so that she and Adam would become a team. A team is a group who are organized together for some common goal. That common goal is the area in which Adam and in our case in which the man is called to serve. From a biblical perspective, teamwork involves sharing in the biblical responsibilities based on biblical goals, values, priorities, giftedness, and training. God made Eve to be a team player. God designed each wife to be the ultimate team player. A team player does not seek to be a one-person show, but works together with her husband and uses their skills and abilities in a cooperative way.

Staying in love forever will require that couples exhibit a commitment to God as outlined in the original design of marriage (Ordermige).

Related Articles

12 Things Not to Say to Someone Who Loves Staying In

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In Christ,

 

Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell PO Box 1668 Blackwood, NJ 08012 (856) 566-3267 www.advancedmarriagetraining.com

 

Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land -Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives) – Advanced Marriage Training for Singles

All Three          Advanced

 

“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.

 

Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell

Samaritan Baptist Church

Trenton, NJ “I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.

 

Dr. James E. Woods, II

El Shaddia Christian Assembly

Philadelphia, PA

Derrick and Sheila

How can couples keep disagreements from tearing their marriage apart?

In a recent article, it is suggested that little disagreements are at the primary cause that is tearing marriages apart. Couples who intend to remain married must have the fortitude to overcome many obstacles. Couples can avoid the disagreements that can tear them apart by developing a strategic plan for their marriage.

According to the article, It’s the Little Disagreements That Tear a Marriage Apart, a 10 year Australian survey revealed that men are the happiest in the first few years of marriage, when they have no dependent children, their wife is five years or more younger than them, wife has a high school diploma or less, wife does not work, wife has good physical and mental health, wife is an extrovert, agreeable, conscientious, and emotionally stable, and the wife does not smoke.

The marriage survey revealed that woman are the happiest in a non marriage committed marriage of less than three years, have no dependent children, their partner is five years or more younger than them, partner has a high school diploma or less, she does not work, partner is in good mental and physical shape, partner is agreeable and she is not, partner is conscientious and emotionally stable and neither partners smoke.

According to the survey both the husband and wife are the happiest:

  • In the first few years of marriage
  • They have no dependent children
  • The other person has less than a high school education
  • The wife does not work
  • Both are agreeable, conscientious, and emotionally stable
  • Both are in good physical and mental health

The marriage survey revealed that both the husband and wife are the unhappiest:

  • When they have dependent children
  • When the other partner is five or more years older than the other
  • Partner is in poor physical or emotional health
  • When one smokes and the other does not smoke

An evaluation of the breaking points for marriages, according to this survey, is having no dependent children and both the husband and wife are in good physical and mental health. It is quite unnatural for both a husband and wife to desire to not pro create.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of a childfree marriage?

The advantages of a childfree marriage include having more time for yourself and other relationships, you won’t have as many time restrictions, the world will be less crowded which will result in less depletion of scarce resources, and the couple will have additional monies that would have been spent on children. The disadvantages of a childfree marriage include that the couple will be considered a misfit among their peer group, the couple will miss our of what many have considered a crucial role in life, and you will not have anyone to take care of you grow older.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of a healthy spouse?

The answer to this question should be self explanatory. No spouse desires for their spouse to suffer the tragedies that are associated will poor health. Poor health means that the other spouse has an additional worry along with many other worries that can complicate life. However, an additional complication is the financial stress that unhealthiness can have on a marriage.

The common denominator is money. The lack of money can tear a marriage apart. Couples can avoid this trap by developing a strategic plan for their marriage. Developing a strategic plan requires first developing a family shared vision based on what each persons values are in a marriage followed by developing goals, objectives, timelines, and associated costs. Following this process will eliminate the disagreements that can tear a marriage apart.

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In Christ,

 

Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell

PO Box 1668 Blackwood, NJ 08012 (856) 566-3267 www.advancedmarriagetraining.com

 

Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land -Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives) – Advanced Marriage Training for Singles

 

Advanced          All Three

 

 

 

“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.

 

Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell

Samaritan Baptist Church

Trenton, NJ “I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.

 

Dr. James E. Woods, II

El Shaddia Christian Assembly

Philadelphia, PA

Derrick and Sheila

 

 

What is a major key to a successful marriage?

In a recent article, an author attempts to provide tips for a successful marriage. The marriage tips are absent the necessity of moral character that both the man and the woman need to bring to the marriage. The key to a successful marriage involves a commitment to the original design for marriage.

According to the article, the ten principles for a successful marriage include:

  1. Happiness is not the most important thing.
  2. Couples discover the value in just showing up.
  3. If you do what you always do, you will get same result.
  4. Your attitude does matter.
  5. Change your mind, change your marriage.
  6. The grass is greenest where you water it.
  7. You can change your marriage by changing yourself.
  8. Love is a verb, not just a feeling.
  9. Marriage is often about fighting the battle between your ears.
  10. A crisis doesn’t mean the marriage is over.

The first problem in many marriages is commitment. Most people who eventually get married have little understanding what it takes to be committed to God. How can a man and woman expect to be committed to one another without knowing how to be committed to God.

What type of commitment to God will develop the necessary characteristics for a successful marriage?

According to Matthew 22:37-38, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment”. Jesus instructs us that our commitment to God should be at the top of our list for daily living. Every part of our lives must be focused on God.

Additionally Jesus tells us that our commitment to Him must supersede our commitment to our families. We know this because Jesus stated that “If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after Me cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:26-27). Those who cannot make that kind of commitment cannot be His disciple.

According to Acts 6:1-4, “And in those days, when the number of the disciples was multiplied, there arose a murmuring of the Grecians against the Hebrews, because their widows were neglected in the daily ministration. Then the twelve called the multitude of the disciples unto them, and said, It is not reason that we should leave the word of God, and serve tables. Wherefore, brethren, look ye out among you seven men of honest report, full of the Holy Ghost and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business. But we will give ourselves continually to prayer, and to the ministry of the word”, a disciple is a servant and is actively engaged in helping others in practical ways.

According to the original design of marriage, men are called to be servants of God. For men to have a successful marriage, they must have a commitment to serve God. However, many men opt to place a premium of money instead of serving God.

No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon (Matthew 6:24).

Since God’s word is true, there is no way that a man can expect to have a successful marriage unless they choose to serve God first.

According to Genesis 2:18, women are called to help their husbands. The irony is that me are taught to be team players more that men are. We see this evident in the number of opportunities that are offered to boys to play sports. Girls do not have the same opportunities. It is almost a though we are training the men to take on the man’s role by the way that we develop children. A women cannot expect to have a successful marriage unless she learns how to be a team player.

Related Articles

Ten Secrets to a Successful Marriage

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In Christ,

 

Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell PO Box 1668 Blackwood, NJ 08012 (856) 566-3267 www.advancedmarriagetraining.com

 

Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land -Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives) – Advanced Marriage Training for Singles

All Three     Advanced

 

“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.

 

Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell

Samaritan Baptist Church

Trenton, NJ “I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.

 

Dr. James E. Woods, II

El Shaddia Christian Assembly

Philadelphia, PA

 

Derrick and Sheila